Episode 5 Bloggy-Blog!
Here we go again! I loved this episode. There was an amazing challenge, a great blindside, a good power move by Jim, and some hilarious moments. My only complaint: where the heck is Rick!? I mean, even Purple Whitney got a confessional this time. I need more Rick in my life! Also, food for thought: One tribe has had CRABS for a while now (Upolu—Coach, Rick, Albert, Brandon and Sophie are intact) while the other tribe (Savaii) apparently has herpes, according to Cochran. Which would YOU rather have? Get ready, this is a longer Bloggy-Blog than usual. You can never have too much Bloggy-Blog, right?
THE DUELSKI- Stacey is hilarious. I wish she could narrate the entire episode every week. She comes to Redemption Island and informs Christine that things are not so “hunky derrrrrry” over at Upolu and that Coach is running things. The next day, the two ladies duel it out, but first Stacey spills the beans to Savaii about Benjamin running things over at Upolu with Albert as his right hand man. Add in some “booms” “kapoots” and some “bam-pows” and you have the gist of what went down. Christine ends up winning the duel and Stacey is sent packing. I am going to miss Stacey. However, I am impressed by Christine, maybe she will “pull a Matt” after all!
UPOLU- Over at Upolu, Albert is not happy about Stacey calling him out for being Coach’s right hand man. He thinks it will make him a huge target at the merge. Oh, Albert. You have MERGE TARGET written all over you. Just like Rick is the poster child for snoring, you are the poster child for merge targets. You should know this! Additionally, Coach is upset with Stacey’s bean spillage. He lectures the tribe and tells them that he will go nuts if anyone calls him Benjamin like they were doing over at Redemption Island. Apparently Coach was called Coach since he was 18.
That’s……awkward. However, the best line of the night came from Brandon: “Who’s Benjamin?” This made me like Brandon again. In other Upolu news, Albert finds the hidden immunity idol clue after walking around in his tight undies which I will not comment about further because he probably already thinks I’m creepy. Which I am. Albert then tells Sophie and Coach about the clue. Smart or silly move? I’m not sure. Although Coach now has the idol, it probably strengthened the bond between the three and we also now know that the S.A.C. is running the C.R.A.B.S! I find the nickname of Sophie, Albert and Coach as S.A.C. to be completely fitting, just saying. (I must give credit to where credit is due: Rene Herrera on my Facebook page discovered SAC—I have a creative team of collaborators. Everyone wants in on the CRABS fun!)
SAVAII- Over at Savaii, people are doing what they do best. Elyse and Ozzy are snuggling, Ozzy does some impressive fishing, Cochran is cutting open coconuts, Jim is scheming, and Whitney and Keith are also being jungle lovers. I’m not sure what Dawn is doing. Probably something awesome. (Dawn is now one of my favorite contestants, along with Cochran, Sophie, and Purple Rick.) This was the episode where things start to shake up on Savaii. After hearing the news from the duel, Ozzy made the comment that if he were Coach he would get rid of Albert NOW instead of later. Jim points this out to Keith, and that little bug called paranoia starts to get to Keith. Brilliant, Jim. Good boy.
GOT MEAT?! Seriously, this episode’s challenge was amazing/disgusting/sexy/straight out of a horror film. I’m kidding about the sexy part. Or am I? Anyway, I’m a huge fan of disturbing horror flicks, so I was excited to watch something that felt like it should be in Saw or Silence of the Ricks. Both tribes had to rip pieces of meat from slimed up carcasses and carry the meat in their mouths to the trays. There was lots of spitting, grabbing meat from other’s mouths, tearing meat and it looked painful. The challenge was also edited so brilliantly—the music, the angles, the horror! Upolu ends up winning by two ounces. TWO OUNCES!
After the challenge, Upolu takes home the goods (the meat, spices, bread, herpes) and we learn that Brandon is an excellent cook! I liked Brandon this episode. I feel like everyone is a bit harsh on him. When it comes down to it, he is just a kid. Survivor can be a huge biotch, and I really hope that Brandon comes out of all this with a positive experience and grows from it. Back at Savaii, the mood is not very “hunky derrrry.” They just lost immunity AND a ton of food by two measly ounces. It also doesn’t help that Cochran points out they may have herpes. He makes a good point though: “You haven’t lived until you’ve had a cold sore!” As Savaii prepares for Tribal Council, there is some strategy brewing. Jim is gunning for Elyse, while Elyse and Ozzy think it’s Cochran. This leaves Whitney and Keith in the middle! What is going to happen?!
TRIBAL COUNCIL- THE RELEASE OF ELYSE. I was feeling a little Semhar-ish today so I decided to try out a little Spoken Word for fun. Don’t judge me. Here’s a little diddy!
Savaii goes to tribal after facing defeat.
They don’t got no spices. They don’t got no meat.
They assemble inside, not looking too grand.
Except for Mom Dawn with her shnazzy head band.
Everyone’s hurting—that challenge was rough.
Scrapes, hurt jaws and other bad stuff.
Pretty Elyse is getting too smug.
She thinks it is Cochran, that cute little bug.
The voting goes down, it is quite a shock.
Two go for Dawn and two go for Coch.
Elyse is surprised that she also got two.
She is quite perplexed, what wrong did she do?
The last vote is read, and it goes to “Elise.”
Goodbye pretty girl, much love and peace.
Did she deserve it, and who is to blame?
I’d also be pissed that they can’t spell my name.
Lys goes to Redemption-- Christine she will face.
She’ll either come back, or she’ll be 15th place.
There ya go! Hope you liked this episode and Bloggy-Blog number 5. What will happen next week? How will Ozzy react? How will Whitney and Keith play off their random Dawn vote? Will the SAC continue to run the CRABS? Will we get to hear Coach’s Chucky the Cheese story? Who is now in power over at Savaii? Things are getting interesting! Stay tuned. Also, I will be at the Reality Rescue charity event in Virginia this weekend and I hope to meet a lot of people there! Xoxo, Dre Dre.
follow the cutest blogger ever on twitter @andreaboehlke
enjoy your blog, but in the future don't reveal who is voted out on twitter the same day as the show. not everyone can watch right when the show comes on and it ruined my dvr experience. love you!
Posted by: Cochran | 10/13/2011 at 06:13 PM
Frisky, not creepy - being visually attracted to Albert's tight forming underwear is normal for 20-some ladies.
Brandon denying his visual attraction to Mikala and imagining this attraction as temptressing is creepy.
"Chucky Cheese stories" is Stacey's way of saying "tall tales to captivate kiddies".
Albert is the snorer, according to Rick.
I see Polonium is late with his trolling.
You need more practice with your spoken word art.
Posted by: Testo | 10/13/2011 at 06:37 PM
It's not trolling when I am 100% in support of Andrea's b.loggessing.
Fierce blog as always! I loved the poem. It rhymed, and as I have always believed, all poems must rhyme.
<3
Posted by: Polonium | 10/13/2011 at 07:39 PM
That was a very cute/funny blog. Didn't know you were writing them this season but enjoyed it immensely!
Posted by: Callan | 10/14/2011 at 01:40 AM
Your Blog its the best so faaar... I love Reading you!!! xD
Posted by: Mal3xu | 10/14/2011 at 02:09 PM
This was absolutely fantastic Andrea. I love your sense of humor while still calling the episode as it is seen. I loved it too the way the innocent dumbass Brandon quietly says, "Who's Benjamin" is he for real?
Loved the spoken word, don't be too surprised if Semhar is learning that right now and when Lys, Elice or even Elise makes it to Ponderosa, she's going to recite to her.
Look forward to next week's blog :)
Posted by: Rob | 10/15/2011 at 12:51 AM
I'm routing for the fat gay guy. Christine caleld Coach a tool and a dope. She cast the first stone by calling Coach temporary and she wants clemency? I hope when she finally gets whats coming to her, Coach is there and he gives her the boo hoo face she gave him at tribal council. The only good that can possibly come out of Christine is a Sue Hawk like speech if she somehow makes it to the final three. In the meantime, Semhar was no big loss. Anytime she spoke what she caleld poetry I heard crickets begging for the pain to go away.
Posted by: Karishma | 08/24/2012 at 12:53 PM
hey, collin this is zach the guy the told you that we weren't in the swapms any more. I appreciate you soo much i feel like i was reborn and now has an amazing love for god and it was because of you you should come back to fefc marathon everyone would love to see you and invite you to the entire middle school family!p.s. i hope you found a good pair of boots!!Zach Chips
Posted by: Christoper | 08/26/2012 at 06:54 PM
Hi Exarch-Dude I am totally bemumd yours wasn't hi-res enough to be in. I'm comforted by the fact that I still have the lo-res version, and I'll bug you incessantly for the next round I'll have plenty at TAM, more than enough unless you are personally planning to buy over 200. Then I won't have enough, and will have to ship.See you there!-A
Posted by: Austine | 08/26/2012 at 09:19 PM